Emotional abuse is an attempt to control another person by manipulating them. It diminishes the victim’s self-esteem. They start to feel powerless and helpless without their abuser. The victim develops a trauma bond or an unhealthy attachment to their spouse. Therefore, no matter how much distress the marriage is causing the victim, they still cannot find the willpower to pursue a divorce.
Emotional abuse can cause serious mental and physical illness. You need to recognize the signs that your spouse is emotionally abusing you before it’s too late.
What are the signs that your spouse is emotionally abusing you?
You might feel like you love your spouse, that you need them. But you cannot seem to understand why their behaviors and words cause you so much pain. Sometimes you might not want to confront them for fear that they will retaliate with unreasonable anger. Your spouse makes you feel depressed and anxious, yet you refuse to acknowledge their abusive behavior toward you. It’s time you understand how they are perpetuating the abuse:
- Your spouse is overly critical of your actions and what you say
- Your spouse humiliates you in front of other people
- Your spouse constantly shames and demeans you
- Your spouse makes you feel guilty all the time
- Your spouse withholds affection and intimacy to punish you
- Your spouse isolates you from your friends and family
- Your spouse might even say disparaging remarks about people close to you
- Your spouse accuses you of things you did not even do
- Your spouse invalidates your feelings and opinions
- Your spouse makes unreasonable demands
You feel like you are never good enough and lose your self-worth. Emotional abuse is cruel, and you should not tolerate it any longer. In Connecticut, intolerable cruelty is one of the grounds for divorce.
Divorce is not the end
Your spouse might try to use the finances to prevent you from leaving. However, you should know that the court can award you spousal support and will divide all your marital property equitably. Divorce can give you a chance to rebuild your confidence and build a life free from abuse. You deserve to be happy.